Yes & no

I honestly don't know why, but in the last few months, the question I'm asked most often is "do you miss playing in a band"?  I don't think at any time I've implied that I do or would like to again - it's fine and I'm happy to answer in as best a manner as possible, but it is surprising - the frequency that it comes up.  I very rarely speak about my band experiences because it's now so far in the past, so it's interesting that I'm still aligned with having been a musician.

It could be partly because of the re-connections I've made recently, which is wonderful - having people re-enter your life is great thing.  Especially when you're able to find completely mutual ground.  So I understand why they might be curious and I'm happy to fill in the blanks.  But because I've been asked a lot, I've actually thought about a proper answer.

Which is both "yes" and "no".  And neither can be looked upon negatively.  I miss playing with other musicians in general.  It's a great spirit and camaraderie; when you can make music you enjoy with people who enrich your life - that's powerful and moving.  It's pure joy and spiritually uplifting, especially as you get older.  If it's a "band" - like The Punch Line were - it's something that you and your bandmates created; it belongs to you and there's an emotional bond that can't be accurately put into words.  I miss the simple "fun" factor - even though it has to be seen from a now much-older perspective.  Being able to laugh at silly in-jokes, etc. - again, it was something that was all ours.  And the music you bring to life - as a collective; say what you will - there's something still magical about it.

The "no" is also not negative, because you have to look at everything with time, temperance and perspective - I don't miss it because I'm 57 now.  It takes energy - something, at the moment, I don't have a great deal of.  Time and emotional investment - also unavailable.  It's work and having been through it previously, I wouldn't want to repeat that intense cycle.  Of the obvious, I certainly don't miss the fighting, silly politics, self-absorbed nonsense - and I am equally guilty/culpable of just as much as the other members of the band.  We're also strangers now and I don't know if I would feel comfortable around them - I'm not great at "feeling out" processes anymore.  

At the same time, as I said earlier, there have been a lot of surprising and welcomed reconnections in my life.  If any of my former bandmates were to be in touch, etc., I don't see any reason why we couldn't create a foundation for renewed friendship.  That's a good enough criteria to start with.  Anything else would be speculation, which I don't think is right.  

But as the saying goes, "never say never".