Where do we go from here?

Still a strangely transitional time.  I don't feel 100% healthy - fighting off a standard head cold, aside, I am somewhat uncomfortable in the aftermath of my prostate issues and hospitalization.  I think I need to accept and adjust to the idea that I'm probably not going to be at the standard that I was accustomed to - age, illness and time is not helpful.  If I can put my mind in the right frame, I'll be okay. 

It doesn't help that I'm continuing to deal with an insurance company that is denying my hospitalization, saying that I didn't need it - according to them, sepsis didn't warrant an I.V. and an infectious disease doctor monitoring my white blood cell count...  Infuriating as it's frustrating, time consuming and crass beyond words.  But I am not giving up; I'm working with a very good, caring advocacy group that deals specifically with this kind of nonsense.  Which is a shame, but I'm grateful for their help and input.  So we'll see where and how this goes.

I'm trying to re-establish a sense of being sociable again, as well.  Had friends over to the apartment for the first time since before the pandemic started; had a wonderful day out.  Good vibes, pleasurable company and a lot of laughs, which, I realize, I've missed.  Making an effort to speak with friends on the phone and solidify relationships of substance.  It surprises me how much I've distanced myself from people in general - I only ever seem to speak with 4 or 5 people and they're family.

I'm not sure I even have an answer as to the "how" or "why", but I do know that I really need to improve my approach and re-spread my wings of friendship, companionship and the like.  It's not hard to do but it's been difficult to motive myself.