Exhale (still life into infinity)

I know the last entry was one that I didn't want to have to write, but I needed to see the words in front of me, rather than speaking them.  The very painfully real possibility that I might have cancer - especially after winding up in the hospital for 4 days, for the first time in my life.

Fortunately - and with endless thanks to God - the results of the biopsy were all benign.  My urologist said "you do not have cancer, so put it out of your mind" - I nearly wept, but I was numb.  I was still in discomfort from the biopsy, the infection, the medication and the aftermath of being in the hospital.  It took me up until the weekend to finally process that I don't have the feared disease.  How often does one get the happy news?  I was fully braced for impact, but I am so grateful and relieved.  I still don't feel 100% after the biopsy and will remain on antibiotics until this coming Saturday, but I am finally starting to diffuse from this.

Life - and how to live it - takes on a whole new meaning.  I'm one of the lucky ones and I know it.