Reflecting pool
Today is the last day of "vacation" before I start at Turn Up The Music. Have had a lot of time to think; to live inside my own mind in a way I hadn't had a chance to do previously.
When I started this blog last December, I was coming up on my 40th birthday, had re-joined The Punch Line and was heading toward what I thought was a fairly staid, quiet life of marriage, working in the city and occasionally playing in a band. I had just started the gym (another new addition/element in my life) and was rebuilding my emotional life.
As the year (which seems so LONG at this point) progressed, I started to feel and witness changes. I became disenchanted with my job as it was evident I was going to go nowhere in it; the band started to go in the direction that it had gone when I threw in the towel the last time and I began to dislike living in the place that I'd grown up in. I wanted better; better for myself and truthfully, better for Liz. I always feel she deserves better. We talked about moving to New Jersey and started putting feelers out; I started sending out resumes and quietly interviewing. My idea or vision of what I wanted started becoming clearer. I took a step back from The Punch Line and let the diffusion happen so I would not become unhappy but rather re-enthused.
Chris and I spent a Saturday morning mixing four songs and breathing new life into the recordings. To look at one another and say "wow" when we were done. Having Bobby hear them and say the same thing. Knowing that we still love The Punch Line and the album as much as (if not more than) before was powerfully re-invigorating. Then I found myself arbitrarily let go from my job and not knowing exactly what to do except to not panic. I started looking without a time lapse for a new job. I found one. Not one that I had to take out of necessity, but of desire--how often do you find and get an offer for a job you really want? I had joked (and forgive the repetitiveness) that I wanted to move to New Jersey and then find a job there. I found a job in New Jersey and will be working there--the hardest part is now achieved.
Yesterday, I went to see the apartment in Roselle Park; I filled out the application and paid for the credit check and met not only the super, but the building manager, who said they'd make sure they would "take care of us" and have exactly what we want/need for the beginning of February. I drove around the area, mapping out the points of necessity to show Liz this weekend. The train is 6 blocks by foot from the apartment. My job is 10 minutes by foot from the apartment. The gym I found in Kenilworth is 3 minutes from my job. There are all the necessities you could want within walking distance. There is a guitar shop at the end of what will become our street. There is a parking lot for the car. Route 22, which leads to Union, where The Punch Line rehearse, is two minutes from the apartment. Everything--all small-level, but vitally important--we need to live a quiet, comfortable life. So I have even more hope than I did before. Even though we're only at the end of September, December (when we would need to sign the lease) will crop up quickly and the move will take time to complete (packing, discarding what we won't be taking, contacting utilities, etc.). And I will remain as high on hope as possible.
We still need to mix the last two songs and I believe they will sound as great as the balance of this album. Enough said.
Tonight, I'm supposed to meet my cousin Adam for dinner in the city. It's a chance to get to know one another. Another happy addition to my list of "all the good things" that have been happening in my life to counter whatever you could deem "bad". Nothing has been all that bad.
And because I can think about it while I haven't had anything to do all week, I can smile and relax.
When I started this blog last December, I was coming up on my 40th birthday, had re-joined The Punch Line and was heading toward what I thought was a fairly staid, quiet life of marriage, working in the city and occasionally playing in a band. I had just started the gym (another new addition/element in my life) and was rebuilding my emotional life.
As the year (which seems so LONG at this point) progressed, I started to feel and witness changes. I became disenchanted with my job as it was evident I was going to go nowhere in it; the band started to go in the direction that it had gone when I threw in the towel the last time and I began to dislike living in the place that I'd grown up in. I wanted better; better for myself and truthfully, better for Liz. I always feel she deserves better. We talked about moving to New Jersey and started putting feelers out; I started sending out resumes and quietly interviewing. My idea or vision of what I wanted started becoming clearer. I took a step back from The Punch Line and let the diffusion happen so I would not become unhappy but rather re-enthused.
Chris and I spent a Saturday morning mixing four songs and breathing new life into the recordings. To look at one another and say "wow" when we were done. Having Bobby hear them and say the same thing. Knowing that we still love The Punch Line and the album as much as (if not more than) before was powerfully re-invigorating. Then I found myself arbitrarily let go from my job and not knowing exactly what to do except to not panic. I started looking without a time lapse for a new job. I found one. Not one that I had to take out of necessity, but of desire--how often do you find and get an offer for a job you really want? I had joked (and forgive the repetitiveness) that I wanted to move to New Jersey and then find a job there. I found a job in New Jersey and will be working there--the hardest part is now achieved.
Yesterday, I went to see the apartment in Roselle Park; I filled out the application and paid for the credit check and met not only the super, but the building manager, who said they'd make sure they would "take care of us" and have exactly what we want/need for the beginning of February. I drove around the area, mapping out the points of necessity to show Liz this weekend. The train is 6 blocks by foot from the apartment. My job is 10 minutes by foot from the apartment. The gym I found in Kenilworth is 3 minutes from my job. There are all the necessities you could want within walking distance. There is a guitar shop at the end of what will become our street. There is a parking lot for the car. Route 22, which leads to Union, where The Punch Line rehearse, is two minutes from the apartment. Everything--all small-level, but vitally important--we need to live a quiet, comfortable life. So I have even more hope than I did before. Even though we're only at the end of September, December (when we would need to sign the lease) will crop up quickly and the move will take time to complete (packing, discarding what we won't be taking, contacting utilities, etc.). And I will remain as high on hope as possible.
We still need to mix the last two songs and I believe they will sound as great as the balance of this album. Enough said.
Tonight, I'm supposed to meet my cousin Adam for dinner in the city. It's a chance to get to know one another. Another happy addition to my list of "all the good things" that have been happening in my life to counter whatever you could deem "bad". Nothing has been all that bad.
And because I can think about it while I haven't had anything to do all week, I can smile and relax.
posted by R L Ross at
9:04 AM
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