Where are we going?

I guess that's a rhetorical question - I feel like many of us have reached a point of "now what?"-ness.  Everything is still uncertain and with the rapid passing of time, there's less connection to the things that helped shape and inform our lives. 

For me, at 56, I no longer feel a sense of belonging; I don't seem to care about too much or have any driving passions that fuel me.  Worst of all, it doesn't frighten or upset me.  The facts are clear:  so much has been taken away because of the events over the last year-plus.  And when something is gone - especially a feeling - it's impossible to bring it back.  Going to see live music?  Why - to be constricted to wearing these damn masks uncomfortably while others around me may be carrying the "germ"?  It's already proven itself that the so-called "vaccine" doesn't prevent COVID, which is what a vaccine is supposed to do.  I had my shot, but I will not get a booster.  I've had my flu shot (like I always do) - enough with the chemicals coursing through my body.  Plus, there are so few performers I have the desire to see, so that doesn't help.

I've actually put two of my guitars up for sale, with a probable two more to follow.  I haven't played and I really don't know if I'm going to.  I don't have a band and it's become too much work during the little free time that I can find.  Relaxation is hard - I work long hours at a job that just sustains me financially but nothing more.  I wake up; I have my breakfast, shower and leave for work, where I'm at from 8 until 6.  Then I commute home.  I'm exhausted most of the time, by day's end.

Will I have a change of mind and heart?  I don't know.  I can't see the future.  Only where I am at the moment, like many others around me.