Game changers

There are two separate schools of thought for this posting.

This past Sunday, for the first time in my life - and fourteen years after I first planned on doing it - I went for a spa day on Staten Island.  I had bought myself a "package" for a complete day last June and I finally found the right time - now that the surgery is long over, a quiet holiday weekend, etc.  I'm so glad I did it and will now do so regularly.  It did wonders for me - mentally and physically.  The staff were incredible - beyond kind and helpful.  Starting the proceedings with a warm towel and espresso to laying out the day's plans, a fantastic lunch and genuine professionalism and personality.  I couldn't have asked for better.  What made it even greater was that it was an ugly, cold, rainy day, so it wasn't wasted indoors.  Jesus - even my nails and eyebrows look great - seriously!

At the opposite end, I received very sad and upsetting news on Tuesday - the drummer for the band that influenced me the most during my teen years; the band that pointed my way forward and changed the game for me, died suddenly on Monday, after a brief illness.  Hearing this caught me off-guard and left me very shaken.  Rick Buckler was the driving powerhouse behind The Jam for the whole of their career.  After their split in '82, he was in a very good and completely overlooked group called Time U.K., who put out some great singles.  I never had the pleasure or privilege of meeting him, but he was, from all accounts, a very good person.  And I know he was appreciated by me.  Godspeed, Mr. Buckler.

Always looking forward - no time for backward

Already a month into this year and I'm already 60 years old; the country has changed Presidents and people have gone right back into the same embarrassing behaviors they had at least nearly a decade ago.  I can no longer digest nor allow my time to be wasted or compromised - whatever you want to call it - with listening to the same shit over and over again.  The sputtering garbage that long-time, real-world friends are coming up with; the wild-eyed frenzy is too much unnecessary work.  I used to have a very fair approach - whatever your views are, I respect you; you're my friend, etc. 

Now, it's very clear that people will sacrifice their families, friends, spouses - you name it - in the name of their violently misguided, evangelical and misinformed "politics".  They want people to lose jobs; expose home addresses and be harmed/actually call for murder.  If this is your stance, you're not welcome in my orbit at all.  I won't even listen to you - you cross that line; you're dead to me.  It's not some overdramatic hyperbole or self-righteousness on my part - if you're that unhinged about something that actually doesn't really affect your life and never has, I want nothing to do with it. 

As I've said on many occasions, I don't know why so many people I've respected - especially friends I've had for decades - have gone in this kind of direction.  I can pinpoint a few possible reasons why, but it doesn't justify their actions towards their own family, loved ones, etc.  It's become a fanaticism; a cult-like approach and I can easily live without their incessant barking of the memorized script.  It's a lunacy there is no cure for.

On the upside, my use and time spent on social media is decreased by about 90%.  Not an exaggeration.  I don't interact on Facebook; I don't care for Instagram and Twitter/X is mildly entertaining.  TikTok is clearly for disturbed narcissists, and I've never indulged.  I'm far too happy at the moment to allow all these nonsensical outside "influences" derail things.  

Ever since my surgery, I'm feeling alright and always looking to feel even better; I'm going to the gym this weekend; I have a urology appointment on Friday (and I didn't need the bloodtest) and a spa day during the long weekend in two weeks.  This year's vacation is already booked, down to the last detail and work is enjoyable.

I won't sacrifice any of the good things I have in my life. Not even for old friends.  They're not that important anymore.  We're not teenagers; we're not young - life is about growth and change.  Not regression and a return to adolescence.